macklemiller said: 80% black and brown? So Asian people don't exist now?
As a black person this makes me really proud but at the same time it really frustrates me because the news never focus on the positive qualities of blacks which in reality actually out weighs the negatives but the media only focus on the negatives.. why does a 4 year old black boy cussing makes huge media headlines but a 4 year black girl genius does not……that’s what really frustrates me.
I think he said that women should offer to pay half, knowing they’ll probably be turned down. I said, well, sometimes — but what if the other person invited you someplace really expensive? What if you agreed to a date with the guy and he spent an hour saying crazy racist shit to you and you felt like you couldn’t escape? This is what led to our real disagreement.
The male debater felt strongly that if a woman wasn’t interested in a second date, she should say so on the spot. If the man says, “Let’s do this again sometime,” the woman shouldn’t say, “Sure, great,” and then back out later. I said that that was a nice ideal, but that he should keep in mind that most women spent most of their lives living in low-level fear of physical aggression from men. I think about avoiding rape (or other violence) every time I walk home from the subway, every time there’s an unexpected knock at the door, and certainly every time I piss off an unhinged man. So, if I were on a date with a man who I felt was unbalanced, creepy, overly aggressive, or possibly violent, and he asked if I wanted to “do this again sometime,” I would say whatever I felt would avoid conflict. And then I would leave, wait awhile, and hope that letting him down politely a few days later would avoid his finding me and turning my skin into an overcoat.
The male debater was furious that I had even brought this up. He felt that the threat of violence against women was irrelevant, and that I was playing some kind of “rape card” as a debate trick. He got angrier and angrier as we argued. I also got angrier and angrier, although I worked hard to keep speaking in a calm and considered way. He was shouting and cutting me off when I tried to speak. I pointed out that the debater himself was displaying exactly the sort of behavior that would make me very uncomfortable on a date. THAT made him livid.
He then called me “passive-aggressive.”
I was genuinely taken aback. “Actually,” I said, “I call this ‘behaving myself.’” It’s a lot of work to stay calm when you’re just as furious as the other person, and that other person is shouting at you. I felt that I was acting like a grownup — at some emotional cost to myself — and I wanted credit, not insults, for being able to speak in a normal tone of voice when I was having to explain things like, “We can’t tell who the rapists are before they turn violent, so sometimes we have to be cautious with men who do not intend to harm us.”"
|Male Writer:||Ah, anniversary jokes are so funny. Because chicks always hate it when you don't remember anniversaries! A plus gold very original|
|Male Writer:||Mother in laws amirite?|
|Male Writer:||My male character who is an author insert of myself pines after a woman I used to pine after in high school. Then they have sex. This is good literature.|
|Male Writer:||Ugh female books are so romance filled|
|Male Writer:||And girl fanfics, so mary suey|
|Male Writer:||Now listen about this original middle aged man who is an expert in everything, suffers from ennui, looks like me, acts like me, and gets all the girls i want.|
|Male Writer:||She was sexy in an alluring, boring way, filled with purple prose and riddled with objectification|
|Male Writer:||If i make a female character parrot my misogynistic views, they cease to be misogynistic! Are you saying you don't respect my fake female characters opinions, feminists?|
|Male Writer:||a good action girl is one who looks hot at all times|
|Male Writer:||If the female main character got in an asskicking line, my work is Feminist with a capital F and no one can criticize me|
|Specifically White Male Writer:||Heroic tropes are so overdone. I'm going to create a boring white guy with stubble to be a completely original antihero no one has ever seen before TM.|
|Same Guy:||It's original because he is a jerk who gets away with bad behavior, just like I wish i could.|
|Another Specifically White Male Writer:||It's in my universe to only have white men do things in my book. I mean, don't you care about historical accuracy|
|Same Guy:||I mean, it's a generic fantasy verse with no real life time period equivalent and i haven't done any research, but i'm SURE that it's historically accurate. To that dark mideval dragon fighting europe period|
|Same Guy:||Where in Europe? Who cares!|
|Male Writer:||There is no better way to introduce a female character to a male character than by him saving her.|
|Male Writer:||Characters hating each other is good sexual tension!|
|Male Writer:||One female character and five male characters is a good team balance|
|Male Writer:||If my female character chooses to act in a sexist tropey way, it's not sexist. In fact, because she CHOSE to do it, it is Feminist.|
|Male Writer:||I am original|
These are just a few of the show’s dozens of three-dimension portrayals of women with bodies that fall outside the cultural norm. They all have complicated inner lives and diverse wants, goals and desires — both romantic and otherwise. Louis CK recently received praise for depicting a fat woman on his show who calls out his character’s cruel discrimination. But it’s not new fodder for television to portray a fat woman unhappy with her lot, and desperate for the love of an uninterested party. What is new is to see a larger woman pursuing sex and love with absolutely no reference to her shape, and no comments to suggest to viewers that her body should be considered anything but attractive."
here to support and elevate women’s voices (and occasionally meryl streep’s general self)
Saving Face (2012), acid attacks on women in Pakistan
Meanwhile, in America, feminists are complaining about how dress codes are oppressive.
You idiots have never experienced oppression, and pray you never do, because this is what it looks like.
As a South Asian American feminist, let me remind everyone that oppression is not a competition.
Just because we fight one type of sexism doesn’t mean we don’t care about other instances of sexism that don’t affect us directly in our day to day lives.
My heart goes out to this woman and the hundreds of other victims like her. I want to educate people about these kinds of incidents. I support organizations that help women like this.
You may think that dress code issues are trivial, but they are related to a larger issue of women’s bodily autonomy, which affects women’s health and safety.
So please, let’s try to bring awareness and bring about change instead of insulting entire groups of people because they are facing issues that are less scary than the one presented.
“oppression is not a competition”
thank you so much for this wording
You're not watching Orphan Black?
Let’s change that!
You don’t know what it’s about?
It’ll be an even better surprise!
*all links work on mobile
Studies show that women apologize more than men, often for perfectly reasonable acts like, you know, taking up space.
People who know me well, know I do apologize a lot. sometimes over something stupid. But I guess, it goes hand in hand with my low self esteem issues.
I’m not going to lie, when I was a manager at my last job, I corrected one of the girls for saying “Sorry” when we accidentally bumped into each other. Perhaps it was her fault, but it was nothing to be sorry about :)
Everyone should make a living wage. Everyone. Every last person should make enough money to properly feed, clothe, house and medicate themselves no matter what their job position is. And anyone who believes otherwise is an unbaked roll.
Children should remain silent, and they are ‘good’ when they’re quiet, but ‘bad’ when they are not, because they are disturbing the adults and causing trouble. This attitude runs through the way people interact with children on every level, and yet, they seem surprised when it turns out that children have been struggling with serious medical problems, or they’ve been assaulted or abused.
The most common response is ‘well why didn’t the child say something?’ or ‘why didn’t the child talk to an adult?’ Adults constantly assure themselves that children know to go to a grownup when they are in trouble, and they even repeat that sentiment to children; you can always come to us, adults tell children, when you need help. Find a trusted adult, a teacher or a doctor or a police officer or a firefighter, and tell that adult what’s going on, and you’ll be helped, and everything will be all right.
The thing is that children do that, and the adults don’t listen. Every time a child tells an adult about something and nothing happens, that child learns that adults are liars, and that they don’t provide the promised help. Children hold up their end of the deal by reporting, sometimes at great personal risk, and they get no concrete action in return. Sometimes, the very adult people tell a child to ‘trust’ is the least reliable person; the teacher is friends with the priest who is molesting a student, the firefighter plays pool with the father who is beating a child, they don’t want to cause a scene.
Or children are accused of lying for attention because they accused the wrong person. They’re told they must be mistaken about what happened, unclear on the specifics, because there’s no way what they’re saying could be true, so and so isn’t that kind of person. A mother would never do that. He’s a respected member of the community! In their haste to close their ears to the child’s voice, adults make sure the child’s experience is utterly denied and debunked. Couldn’t be, can’t be, won’t be. The child knows not to say such things in the future, because no one is listening, because people will actively tell the child to be quiet.
Children are also told that they aren’t experiencing what they’re actually experiencing, or they’re being fussy about nothing. A child reports a pain in her leg after gym class, and she’s told to quit whining. Four months later, everyone is shocked when her metastatic bone cancer becomes unavoidably apparent. Had someone listened to her in the first place when she reported the original bone pain and said it felt different that usual, she would have been evaluated sooner. A child tells a teacher he has trouble seeing the blackboard, and the teacher dismisses it, so the child is never referred for glasses; the child struggles with math until high school, when someone finally acknowledges there’s a problem.
This attitude, that children shouldn’t be believed, puts the burden of proof on children, rather than assuming that there might be something to their statements. Some people seem to think that actually listening to children would result in a generation of hopelessly spoiled brats who know they can say anything for attention, but would that actually be the case? That assumption is rooted in the idea that children are not trustworthy, and cannot be respected. I’m having trouble understanding why adults should be viewed as inherently trustworthy and respectable, especially in light of the way we treat children."